Okay, so fast forward to this past weekend. I out- did myself on "Date Night" and I must share with you. Gary's schedule causes us to go so much and we travel together for bank business, but it's just not the same as a good, ole' fashioned, Date Night. So, this past week, I tried my hand at searing a ribeye steak in my Dutch oven on the stove top. One of Julia's recipes, of course. I really had no idea how it might turn out, but to my surprise, and Gary's-the steak was outstanding! I cooked it on Tuesday night and Gary was so pleased with it, he said, "Honey, you could make that any night and I'd eat it!" Sooooo.....I did it again, Friday night-for our date night. I told him I had a surprise for him and I'd be in charge of this date night. He had no idea what I had up my sleeve.

So, I gathered my supplies for what might be our best date night ever...Long story short, Gary came home Friday night to another seared ribeye steak with Marsala wine au jus, squash casserole and garlic mashed potatoes. Mmmm! I must say, it was delicious! Gary was delighted. He'll eat anything I cook for him, but he was so pleased with this dinner. We ate by candlelight and it was wonderful. He is always so appreciative, which makes me want to cook even more.

After dinner, I told him to change into his boots and jeans...we were going dancing. Now, I knew he didn't want to go out for long and dance because he'd had a crazy day and he was tired. What he didn't know is that I turned our patio into our very own dance floor! I'd moved all the patio furniture off, hung white lights from the pergola, (thanks for your help Bree) and set up a couple of lamps to create a romantic ambiance. I'd also made a homemade margarita with powdered sugar (his favorite), and served it in a chilled margarita glass. I even drank a couple of glasses of wine...something I haven't done in quite some time. One glass, and I was feeling it. I'm glad I was at home with Gary. I wouldn't have felt comfortable anywhere else.

Earlier in the week, I'd downloaded about 30 country and western songs on my IPod and had it ready to go. The first song: Sweet Home Alabama---but of course! When Gary walked outside and saw the patio, he got tears in his eyes! That even shocked me! He couldn't believe I'd gone to all this trouble to set up our patio for us to dance on...plus the meal...plus the margarita...everything---for him. He was moved by my surprise and I was delighted to see his reaction. We danced to fast songs, worked on the "pretzel", slow songs...until we both were out of breath and had to rest. It was so much fun, I can hardly wait to do it again. Thankfully, the weather was just right...we couldn't have asked for a better night.

Now, about the glasses of wine I had...it was okay. I realize that the reason I drank in my past was to cover up the way I felt...which, was never good. I usually felt condemned, shameful and guilty--or perhaps, was in a situation I knew I shouldn't be...drinking made me feel numb to the ill feelings associated with rebellion and sin.

This past Friday night was different. I enjoyed the wine for the taste of it...albeit a dry red wine...it did go well with my steak. I enjoyed myself and was not covering up a bad feeling. I'm not condoning drinking...by all means...don't drink if you don't drink. I think I needed to prove something to myself...could I drink a glass or two of wine without feeling the need to drink the whole bottle? Was I drinking to cover up an ill feeling? I answered those questions Friday night and I can honestly say...I do not feel I am in bondage to alcohol at all. That's a great feeling. I know God deliverers us from anything that is not a part of His will. Being in bondage to alcohol is not a part of His will. Drunkenness is not a part of His will, either. This was a huge step for me. I tend to be such a "black or white" type person...no middle ground....all or nothing. The Bible talks about "moderation"....Maybe God is teaching me just that...on many different levels. Having a glass of wine is just one of them.

I used to be afraid to have one glass for fear I might go overboard and sink into the pits of hell...where I was in 2003....but fear is not a great motivator when its source is the enemy and his plan is bondage. I am not afraid. I am free. Free indeed. Amen to that!