What a fabulous weekend it's been. Beth Moore on Friday night and Saturday morning was fabulous! Meat and potatoes for the Spirit. Love her words.
Now, about my fabulous husband, Gary. Where do I begin? It's a fairy-tale story to me with all the trimmings. I met Gary while volunteering for a golf tournament on April 25, 2005-one day before my 40th birthday. I had been divorced three years and had been searching to know Jesus in a new, intimate way. I felt I had accomplished that, yet, I still longed for the "happily-ever-after." As for many women, that might be our deepest longing. I felt I had healed many areas of my life that had caused me to make wrong choices in men. The most substantial wound being the death of my dad when I was 15 years old. Just beginning to date and yearning to be found desirable by guys-BAM! Out of the blue, Dad has a heart attack and dies instantly. At the time, he was married to my step-mother, Peggy. He and my mom had been divorced for the past three years and I stayed with my dad because Mom couldn't take care of my older sisters and me-not with her drinking problem. Plus, she just couldn't afford to take care of us and Dad could. I had many issues with my mom leaving us, which I just got healing for this past January.
Anyway, long story short-the loss of my dad left a huge hole in my heart; a huge void in the depths of my soul. This wound caused me to search and search for the love of a man, but I never picked the right one. I seemed to search for one that was most like Dad--in an effort to fill that void. Hence, my first marriage and divorce.
Now, by 2005 and much searching and healing, I had made a list of what I was looking for in a spouse. On the list: 1)He loves the Lord, (already), meaning he already has a relationship with Jesus...he is committed to growing that relationship. He reads the Bible, attends church and prays, on his own. 2)I'm attracted to him-there is chemistry between us. Yet, he also desires to remain pure before marriage. 3)He's funny, quick-witted, loves to laugh-not too serious-not a workaholic, adventurous- and not a "show-boat" kind of guy. 4) He sees me and pursues me-he's a leader in life and in this relationship. Confident. 5) He is secure, but not arrogant. He's not a jealous type-but can show concern, and affection. He CAN communicate. The above attributes were absolute MUST HAVES. Then, below that list, I wrote: I hope he: likes to do projects around the house w/me. Can and likes to 2-step and jitterbug dance. Not a drinker or smoker (I don't really care if he drank a beer, but does he have to?) Enjoys hanging out with my friends. Enjoys going out to eat, fine dining and desserts, theater, riding rides (roller coasters, etc.), dressing up for events.
LOVES SHORTY ALMOST AS MUCH AS ME, can relax and sit still sometimes, enjoys NASCAR, enjoys working out, but not obsessive about it, would be willing (as a married couple someday) to teach Bible Study. People know and respect him. He doesn't have a reputation that precedes him, i.e. bar room fighter, drinker, liar, not trustworthy-Rather, they say, "Oh, what a nice guy- good guy." He has a respectable job and is respected at his job.
So, all the above is taken word for word from my journal entry on April 23, 2005. Amazing, huh? We meet on April 25, 2005. I've never made a list like that before-ever. The day of the golf tournament, Karen Saunders and I were asked to keep score for a team that didn't have a score keeper. This was after all the teams teed off the first hole. The "Happy State Bank" team called in and said they needed a score keeper. Karen and I were just standing around after registering teams and getting everyone where they needed to be. We were asked if we could score the Happy State Bank team and we said, "yes." Ahhh...the rest is history! 18 holes later, and a minuscule amount of flirting...I wanted to know Gary better. After the tournament ended and all the teams were in the clubhouse, warming up and drying off after an unseasonably cold, wet and windy day-I found myself standing there next to Gary talking about his late wife, Jatawn. She had battled breast cancer for 12 years. My mom battled breast cancer for 4 years. Neither woman won the battle. We had something in common, if even a sad "something."
I steadied my hand on Gary's left shoulder to remove some of the outer rain gear I had accumulated throughout the day from his teammates. When I did this, a fleeting thought crossed my mind, "this might seem too forward to put my hand on his shoulder..." I did it anyway. He seemed to get nervous and within seconds, he was saying his "goodbyes" and walking out the door. Oh my, did I regret that last move. My first thought was, "I may never see him again...he didn't get my number or anything..." I truly second-guessed everything upon returning home that night. I couldn't stop thinking about every thing, every word, every look that happened throughout that day. It was a magical day to me, despite the chilling weather, just because I met Gary. But had I made a mistake by putting my hand on his shoulder to steady myself? I tormented myself for the next several days over that one move.
As women always do, Karen and I analyzed everything we could remember from our interactions with Gary that day. We both recalled when he jumped onto our cart in between shots to avoid the wind--he said, "Thank You, Lord--the rain has stopped." Karen and I both looked at each other with a hopeful assumption: He must be a Christian, he said, "Thank You, Lord!" We were silly, indeed.
Thankfully, she had taken pictures of their team and suggested I give him a call and ask if he'd like a copy of them. By Friday, I mustered up enough courage to call his office and leave him a message. (Thank goodness he didn't actually answer! I might have gasped for air and choked!)
That's all I'm going to write about tonight in regards to Gary and me. It's a great story and it just gets better and better, but its longer than one blog post. So, you'll have to come back for more later.
Side note: I took Gary to see Julie and Julia today. His first, my second time to see it. This is the movie that inspired me to start a blog in the first place. My next inspired move is to cook Julia Child's Beef Bourguignon for the very first time! I'm so excited to try this recipe. I've never cooked anything "French" before, so we'll see how it turns out. If I really like it and Gary likes it as well, I may buy her cookbook: Mastering the Art of French Cooking. This was such a great movie and I recommend everyone to see it!
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