Voice Recognition

In today's world, technology is taking over on many fronts.  Even in. . . our vehicles!  They now have this "voice recognition" feature in the newer vehicles where you say 10 sentences and your "vehicle" (or someone in it) is trained to recoginize YOUR voice!  What the auto industry didn't account for is the severe Texas Twang we have going on in our neck of the woods.  Even after 10 training sentences, it still doesn't quite get what I'm trying to say, but hey! It's a great start for hands-free driving, huh?

What about you?  Are you successful at recognizing people's voices?  I'll bet you are.  I watch Fox News, (too much) and can recognize many of the anchor's voices without even seeing who is talking. I easily recognize my favorite singers on the radio.  I, of course, know my family's voices, my children, my husband, my in-laws and certainly my friend's voices.  That seems incredibly easy, doesn't it?  In fact, that's no major feat at all.  I'd guess MOST people recognize their family and friend's voices without any hesitation.

What has been swirling around in my head for months on end, is this:  why can't I recognize God's voice as simply as I do everyone else in my life?  Why isn't His voice as easy to recognize with just one or two words?  I'M the one that needs the extra lines of training sentences!  There have been times in my life where I just KNEW that was God's voice telling me something.  I wish I could say that was the norm, but honestly, I've struggled recognizing God's voice at times.

That cunning devil is always telling us something that has just a morsel of truth tied to a bundle of lies, but somehow, we believe the whole bundle!  Why is that?  In my case, it was easier to believe the negative things about me and therefore, "hush" the ability to hear God's voice.

I'm learning (training) my heart to hear God's voice and one way that has made a huge difference is to learn and believe I am who He says I am.  When I KNOW that in my heart, not just my head, I can defend myself from the bundle of lies the enemy throws at me.  The best way for me to know who I am in Him, is to read His word, which tells me EXACTLY who I am.  He is my creator; He knows better than anyone who I REALLY am and what my purpose is.  He never lies.

I love what my "Jesus Calling" devotional says:

 "Be content to be a simple sheep, listening for My Voice and following Me.  I will lead you into restful green pastures and guide you along paths of righteousness."

Simple sheep . . . Listen for His Voice  . . . Follow Him . . .

I want to become so good at recognizing His Voice, that it overcomes all the other voices in my head.  I pray you will too.

"My sheep listen to My Voice; I know them, and they follow Me."  -John 10:27

The End of an Era

So today marks the last day of my 50th Birthday Month....and all I can say is that it has been an EPIC month, even an EPIC year and also, the end of another era....my forties.  This 50th birthday has been one for the record books.  As I always begin celebrating my birthday on April 1st, this year was no different.  Gary and I had already begun dance lessons as we had signed up for the Ascension Academy "Dancing Under the Amarillo Stars" Gala on April 10th.  Being this was my Big 5-OH year, the dance competition was my "50th year challenge to myself." (Gary just graciously agreed to go along with it.)  I didn't just want to do the challenge, I wanted to WIN the challenge!  And we did!  We raised $13,100.00 to win 1st place (2nd place came in around $3000.)  This was the most money one couple had ever raised!  We were more than delighted!! (Thanks to all of you who so generously donated!!)

On Friday night, the 24th, Gary, Terri and I were driving home from an event in the downtown area.  While on I-27, Gary pulled the car off the road onto the shoulder of the freeway!  What in the world??  He said, "Just watch...up there."  "Up there" was a digital billboard sign with advertisements blinking every few seconds, then, out of no where pops up a picture of me and these words-(quite LARGE:) HAPPY 50TH BIRTHDAY, DAWN WELLS  LOVE, GARY.  I could not believe my eyes!!  That was the coolest surprise I have ever had!  Gary did good!!!!

Then as my birthday grew closer, I could feel the anticipation rise inside as we had scheduled an ENDC (Empty Nester's Dance Club) night at Midnight Rodeo. My sister, Terri, came in from Houston to help me celebrate.  Jon, my nephew, was in Amarillo that week as well as he had signed up to join the Army and had tests to take at the Amarillo office.  I wasn't sure who was going to show at Midnight Rodeo since there wasn't much response to the Facebook post announcing the event.  But, no matter what, I knew it would be fun.  My other sister, Tanya and my brother-in-law, Steve were going to be there as well..."we are family....I got all my sisters with me!"  Remember that song?  Well, that's how I felt!

On Saturday, after church, we headed to the Midnight Rodeo. (Kind of sounds like an oxymoron, huh?)  Of course, we arrive at 8:00 when they open and it's not crowded...just as we like it.  But as the hour progressed, people started to show up, one by one...friends I hadn't seen in a long time, friends I know that don't like to dance, an elder and a Pastor, my dance buddies from the Gala, and even my three best high school friends from Levelland, Lubbock and Olton!  I was so surprised to see them walk through the door....each and every one of them!!  My friend, Cindy Skypala walked in with a sack of birthday cards!  She had literally copied and pasted a message to each of my FB friends to mail a card to her for my birthday as a surprise!  Unbelievable!.....no, more like EPIC!  I had more fun at Midnight Rodeo and we danced until 1:00 in the morning!  My feet were screaming, but my heart was over-flowing with joy and love!

Then Sunday arrived, my official birth day and I have to admit, after an EPIC birthday month such as this, even I was beginning to wind down. (God knows Gary was!!)  We had friends and family over for a cookout and birthday cake.  I knew Gary had a birthday present for me, but I had no idea what.  In the back of my mind, I thought he might really surprise me with another dachshund!  But then I labored over the dilemma of adding another dog to our family...what would Sugar think?....how would I share my love between 3 dogs? etc, etc.  My sister, Terri, told me the gift was "practical."  I thought, "practical like my dachshund toaster he gave me for Christmas?"  Hmm? what on earth could it be?

So the time came when I needed to go out to the driveway to see the surprise.  (I still thought maybe a dachshund was out there on the driveway in a crate...haha!)  But the minute I approached the gate, I could see the candy red paint through the slats....I KNEW WHAT IT WAS!  Gary had surprised me with a red Vespa, just like my old one!  EPIC SURPRISE!!!  I'd sold my old Vespa years ago when I published my book and had hinted occasionally, that one day, I'd like to get another one!  Well, here it was...RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!!  Again, I couldn't believe it! Gary did good again!!!

It seemed, at every turn, I was epically surprised by what transpired over the course of this monumental birthday month!  In my quiet time this morning, I just marveled at God, my Father, and His incredible ways as a Daddy.  He knew exactly what I wanted for my 50th birthday.  I'm not talking about the gifts, although they were EPIC, too.  He knew exactly what would bring joy to my heart like no other birthday I've ever had.  Winning the dance competition because I never felt good enough to WIN something competitively, being loved on by my sisters in so many ways I can't count them all, spending quality time with Jon before he goes into the Army, being surprised by Gary in ways I never thought imaginable, gifted with the presence of dear friends from near and far whose appearance was an EPIC gift all in itself!  All of these gifts were from God, I know that.  I know that He spoke to Gary and guided him through this birthday month to give me things my heart desired so deeply.  I am still simply amazed by it all and can only describe it as an EPIC 50TH BIRTHDAY!

My heart is so full and thankful to all of you for the Facebook birthday wishes, the birthday cards you mailed, coming out to celebrate at Midnight Rodeo, my beautiful birthday cake, but most of all, for the love you have shown me over and over.  A very special thank you to my incredibly dear husband, Gary, for his unconditional love and the fact that he "gets me" and still chooses to stay with me. EPIC

Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart. 

Psalm 37:4

Christian Films . . For Women?

Again, Ladies, I thank you in advance for helping Roger and me compile data for this project we're working on together.  Your input is very valuable to us and will remain confidential.

In recent years, there have been numerous Christian films made that have caught the attention of Hollywood and movie-goers alike.  Movies such as, Facing the Giants, Fireproof and God's Not Dead.  Hollywood has even put their dramatic twists on movies such as Noah and Exodus, to name a few. 

Question No. 2

If you had the power and resources to produce a Christian movie for women, what would it be about?

(You are welcome to email me your responses to my email address at:  dawntwells@yahoo.com) 


Be so blessed,


Dawn

A Little Help from My (Lady) Friends. . .

Hi My Sweet Friends,

It's been way too long since my last post, and as usual, I have no excuse worth the effort to type here, so I won't.  I will say, I have missed writing on here and look forward to doing this more often in the near future, so hang with me!

I do need a little help from my dear, women friends.  A friend of mine, whom some of you may know, Roger Lindley, and I are partnering on a project and we need your thoughts, opinions and ideas to help further the project along.  We are compiling data based on your feedback and we really do need your help with this!!  So, I'm going to throw some thought-provoking questions out to you via my blog and link them to my Facebook page.  I don't want this to feel like a burden in any way, yet I can't stress how important your feedback is!  Your responses will remain confidential.  If you don't want to respond on Facebook, I certainly understand that....so feel free to send me your response to my email address at:

dawntwells@yahoo.com


Question No. 1
   
     Rate each of the following words on a scale from 1 - 10.  1 being- the word doesn't spark any emotion in you, and 10 being- the word sparks all kinds of emotions in you!  Then, with your top THREE highest scoring words, tell why each one rated so highly with you.

GRACE
INTENTIONAL LIVING
PERFECTION
IMPERFECTION
ACCEPTANCE
REJECTION
RESPECT
LOVE
REDEMPTION
GUILT

A Message from Death

Good morning, I say.  Another day has dawned for you; but not for everyone.  Most don't know the day I will come to snatch their life away.  Some have an idea, but never the exact day or moment.

Some of you are deathly afraid of me, (no pun intended, really.)  Some of you wish for me.  Some of you cause me to visit you early by taking your own life....which, by the way, was never the plan.

In a blink of an eye, I'm there.  When you least expect it.  I take someone you took for granted.  I take someone too young, you think.  But I always come, don't I?  There's no getting away from me, sad to say, but true.  None of you will make it out of here alive.  Either I will snatch your life, or Jesus will when He returns-IF you belong to Him.

Today is a significant day for you, Dawn, Terri and Tanya.  33 years ago I snatched up your dad's life in the blink of an eye.  One minute he was alive, laughing and having a good time-the next he was gone.  It can happen that quick.  I am that hasty.

But I come to tell you to not be afraid of me.  Be prepared for me.  I am inevitable, I promise you that.  You can't escape me here on Earth.  Know that I am coming for you and all those around you.  Do what you need to do now, don't wait.  Write out your wishes, prepare you wills, get things in order; you will be amazed what a blessing that is for your loved ones.  They are already distraught because of my untimely visit; they need not one more difficult task put upon them.

Got a bucket list?  Get to it!  Start doing all those things you wanted to do, aspired to accomplish or simply wanted to try for the first time.  You think I'm kidding when I say, "I am inevitable" but oh, I'm very serious about that.  In the blink of an eye, it might be you.  I don't tell you that to scare you, I tell you that to prepare you.

Need to forgive someone?  Go do it! Do not wait.  Every day is one day closer to your D-Day or theirs.  Say what you need to say before it's too late.  If you don't, I promise, you'll regret it.

Not certain of life after Me?  Read John 11:25-26-"Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life.  He who believes in Me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me will never die."

Live your life as if today may be your last.  It just might be.

Accessory or Necessity?

Yesterday was one of those days that I could not figure out what I wanted to wear.  Ever have those days?  I knew which boots I wanted to wear, so I began to dress myself from my feet up...however, I changed clothes and "re-accessorized" three times before I was able to confidently leave my house.  Then, there are other days, I know exactly what I want to wear, put it on, accessorize and I'm out the door in no time.  (Hormones may have something to do with the difference in those days!)

For many years, Jesus was just an accessory to my life.  Similar to a pair of earrings or a scarf or a belt.  I didn't wear the same pair of earrings every day, nor the same scarf or even the same belt.  I also didn't "put on" Jesus every day either.  In that, He was an accessory to me, He was only visible in my life on particular days.  Sometimes, if I was having an undoubtedly bad day, I'd certainly make sure to "put Him on;" other days, most days, I chose to "accessorize" with something else, such as, haughtiness, or pride or even self-reliance, in an effort to "dress myself up."  Whatever the case, more days than not, Jesus remained the most underutilized accessory in my closet.

Things are different today; not perfect, but definitely different.  Today, Jesus is not an accessory, but a Life-giving Necessity.  I cannot walk out the door without "putting Him on."  Shoes are a daily necessity, and Jesus is a daily necessity.  I wouldn't leave my house without a pair of shoes, nor do I want to leave the house without Jesus.

The days and/or months that I have neglected to "put Him on" have been the days that sin slyly crept into my life .  It is easily traceable and I know the culprit:  Mornings got rushed; the "to-do" list grew longer and my flesh squealed louder.  Before I knew it, I had temporarily put Jesus on a shelf in my closet as if He was an accessory, not a Necessity.

One of the many beautiful aspects of Jesus, is that, we are NEVER an accessory to Him.  From the beginning of time, we have always been His necessities.  We are so significant, that He died for us so we could have everlasting life, and an abundant life here on Earth!

Have you had days where you just couldn't figure out what to wear?  Have you had seasons in your life that Jesus was an "accessory, not a Necessity?  We all have.  Remember this:  Jesus looks good on us every day! Don't leave home without Him. :)

But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, 

and make no provision for the flesh, 

to fulfill its lusts.

Romans 13:14 (NKJV)

Living BIG or Living small?

I wish I could say the reason I haven't posted since April is because all I've done is LIVED REALLY BIG for the past eight months, but that wouldn't be completely true.  And if it were true, you would have read all about it!  So, suffice it say, I've been lazy, distracted and have overlooked my blog--confession made, let's move on.

Here's the question:  Have you been living really BIG or living really small?  What do I mean by that?  For Christians, we've been promised an abundant, full life.  The definition of "abundant" is this:  present in great quantity; more than adequate; over-sufficient.  Every day we are invited to live a life that is PRESENT IN GREAT QUANTITY; MORE THAN ADEQUATE....OVER-SUFFICIENT....!  Did you hear that? (Trust me, I'm speaking to myself.)  When we accept His offer and surrender to the Holy Spirit, the fruit of the Spirit will be what we receive....love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  What else could we ask for, really?  I mean, seriously, think about that....read through those gifts again....LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS and SELF-CONTROL!  . . . EVERYDAY!  We don't have to do much to live life full of those attributes, we only have to surrender to Jesus every morning and accept His invitiation to live life to the fullest WITH HIM!

Or . . . are we living our lives really small?  When I'm living life small, I'm trapped in my own little world of me.  Just poor ol' me.  Maybe I think my situation is worse than anyone else, or no one understands what I'm going through or if I could just have this or that. . .THEN my life would be full.  The common denominator in a small way of life is me.  Just me.  No one else.   When I live a life so small, there's actually no room for anyone or anything else.  SELF takes up residency in my heart and head and suffocates the life right out of me.  Literally.  Everything else dies because SELF has smothered it to death. We don't even have enough room in our minds to think of someone else.  This is a great tool of the enemy to keep us living a small life and before we know it, we wake up everyday to a small world without hope, without joy, without love-without any of God's goodness.  Trust me, that is no way to live.

I challenge us to open the doors wide to our hearts and mind- spread our wings and soar!  Stop limiting my life to ME.  It causes us to live really small.  Abundant and small just don't go together, now do they?

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. 

I came that they may have life and have it ABUNDANTLY.  

John 10:10 ESV 

Birthday Month Recap. . .

Well, another birthday month has come and gone.  I had the great pleasure last night of having a birthday dinner with my dear friend, Karen Saunders, at Outback, with my favorite appetizer of theirs: Macaroni and Cheese!  In case you didn't know, they make the BEST mac & cheese.

 I explained to Karen why I think I love my birthday so much.  After writing in my journal to God, these thoughts came to mind:  "Every year, I enjoy my birthday more and more.  I just love that day of specialness; knowing You (God) created me on that day for a very special purpose."  Shouldn't we all love that day?  We are made in God's image, to complete some part of His purpose here on Earth.  Wow!  That's extremely special, indeed!

Having declared the year 2013 as the year to fast fear, I faced my fear of cutting my hair short, (very short!)  Years and years of fear, overcome by one day of courage...a whole lot of courage!!!

Karen gave me the most interesting book for my birthday.  Ever Wonder is the title of this thought-provoking book.  Each page has a different question or statement to ponder. Here's the question I attach to overcoming the fear of cutting my hair off: "Why be afraid of something you want?"  let me type that again, Why be afraid of something you want? Simple question; complex answer, huh? I don't know about you, but I have found myself afraid of things I really wanted!  How ridiculous is that?

For years, I've looked at hairstyle magazines and my eye was always drawn towards the short hairstyles....yet, I feared cutting my hair, but I wanted short hair!  It makes no sense, does it?  Granted, I am only talking about something minor in life, such as hair...I've been guilty of fearing more important things I've wanted, such as, intimacy with God or even certain people in my life.

Why do we fear what we want?  That is a question that causes me to think about past behavior, thoughts, actions, etc...all rooted in fear, even though the fear is keeping me from something I really want!  If that is not an indication of how the enemy deceives us, I don't know what it is.

So, here's to another fear blasted away in 2013!!!  I like having short hair.  For me, it is quite freeing.  I think for years I've been a short haired woman trapped in a long-haired girl's body!  Finally, some freedom from the bondage of long hair!!  I look in the mirror and now have the hairstyle I've looked at in magazines for YEARS!  Literally, years (just ask Gary!)  Poor guy, he's had to listen to me talk about wanting short hair the entire time we've been married.....almost 7 years!!!

So. . .I have to ask you. . .Is there something you fear that you really want?  Maybe its time to face that question and move past the fear....what awaits on the other side could be the freedom you long for! :)

They are confident and fearless 

and can face their foes triumphantly.

Psalm 112:8 NLT

Transformed-Made New-Set Free. . .

While working with a woman from North Carolina on developing a message, she asked me to come up with a "tagline"....basically stating what my message is all about.  The tagline needs to be succinct, catchy and easily remembered.  After listing 15 or so different possibilities, I landed on this:

TRANSFORMED - MADE NEW - SET FREE

I base my tagline on my absolute favorite scripture:

2 Corinthians 5:17

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; 

old things have passed away, 

behold all things are made new!" 

 I recite this verse in my head many times when I'm tempted to doubt, fear, feel inadequate or any other negative reaction I might have to life.  This verse is a banner I fly over me when the enemy comes knocking, sometimes, banging my door down to hurt me, tempt me or just flat out lie to me!

As the Lord gives me opportunities to speak to women, I find one thing in common...we women, as Christians, are struggling with some pretty heavy stuff.  It saddens me to hear some of the burdens women are carrying around, heavy laden with grief, fear, anger, sadness, loneliness, unforgiveness, and the list goes on and on.  It makes me so angry with the enemy I could just spit!! (On him, of course.)

We are brand new in Christ.  All of the "old stuff" has passed away because the Spirit of Jesus lives
inside of us!  I love that good news.  It is the absolute truth as well!

The next time you feel the weight of the world on your shoulders, or you're tempted with the things of old, remember the verse:

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; 

old things have passed away, 

behold all things are made new!

Erwin and Othelia Cartrite

It's amazing to me that the last post on my blog was about Sunray and now, three months later, here I am posting about two amazing people from Sunray...ironic.

Yesterday, I attended the most beautiful Celebration of Life Service for two of the most beautiful servants of Jesus: Erwin and Othelia Cartrite from Sunray, my hometown.  They had been married for 62 years and were married in the Sunray Baptist Church....the very church that we celebrated their lives in yesterday.  Two people who lived their entire lives loving each other, their daughters and family and the community of Sunray.  I was blessed to receive their special love as well.

Their youngest daughter, Celesta "Red", and I were the same age.  We began Kindergarten together and graduated together.  While growing up in my dysfunctional home, I found their functional home as a sweet safe haven.  Erwin and Othelia would pick me up for church on Sunday mornings many days and I spent many nights at their house as well.  Despite all their unconditional love and acceptance, I still ventured away from Jesus during my adult life as I rebelled and acted out my anger from life's circumstances.

Many years went by where I didn't come to Sunray much because of the sad memories left in my heart.  But anytime I saw Erwin and Othelia, it was as if no time had passed at all.  Erwin still cut up with me, joked around and Othelia still loved on me just as a mother would.

In August of last year, I had a book signing at Hastings here in Amarillo one Saturday afternoon. Lo and behold who do I see standing before me?  Erwin Cartrite!!!  He was by himself that day, which was very unusual since he and Othelia went just about everywhere together.  He drove to Amarillo that day just to come see me and buy a few of my books.  I couldn't believe it!  I'm not even sure how he found out I was having a book signing that day.  But it didn't matter, I was so delighted to see him.  We visited and joked around as was common with Erwin and he bought several copies of my book that day.  He had some specific people he wanted to give one to.  My heart was delighted to see him.

A month or so later, I was asked to speak in Sunray at the Baptist Church for the Women's Fall Kick-off banquet in October.  Wow, what an honor to be asked to speak at this event.  I felt I was finally ready to return to the town where it all started for me, give my testimony of hope and love on the women of that sweet church.  As the day approached, my heart became more and more excited to go "home" with hope in my heart instead of sad memories.  (See previous post "Coming Full Circle")

Sheryl Cartrite Winegarner and her sweet Mom, Othelia were my biggest fans in the audience.  What an absolute delight to see them that night and love on them and also receive their love as well.  There's a reason Sheryl got the nick name "Mama Sheryl"....she has the kind of love for others that only a mother has....and her love never runs out.  Hmm? I wonder where she got that?? :)

That night, Sheryl and I said we should get together sometime at her parent's house....have lunch and a red velvet cake! (Othelia is quite famous for her red velvet cake....one of my favorites)....We didn't set a date, but it sure sounded like a great idea!

Weeks went by and we decided on December 3rd....Gary was going to be out of town and I could drive to Sunray and spend the afternoon with Sheryl and her parents.  We'd eat a great lunch because they are such great cooks!  So, we did it.  Sheryl's husband, Coach Winegarner, came as well, which was another surprise!  I hadn't seen him in many years!  Coach was one of my favorite coaches from high school and a sure blast from the past as well!  We had enchilada casserole that was out of this world that Sheryl made and red velvet cake as well!  Delicious!!! 

After lunch, we sat around in the living room of Erwin and Othelia's house, where I'd sat many a time before, and we visited and visited and visited about everything and anything!  Mrs. Rogers, my 8th grade English teacher joined us as well and we laughed out loud til our sides were hurting!

As I was getting ready to return to Amarillo, now about 6:00 in the evening, we decided we needed to take some pictures and oh, am I glad we did!  Erwin was trying to use my phone to take pictures of Coach, Sheryl and me, but kept putting the phone down right after he snapped the picture, so we kept coming up short.....lol! 

We laughed so hard out there on the driveway at Erwin's photography abilities I thought I might pee in my pants!!  He was absolutely hilarious!  We finally got some pics and I got on my way home to Amarillo with a smile as wide as the Grand Canyon across my face!  What a day!  Yes, what a day it was to remember.

 Just a few weeks later, Othelia was diagnosed with brain cancer and the prognosis wasn't good.  I couldn't believe it.  In early January, she was admitted to BSA for dehydration and I went up to see her.  Celesta was in town from Minneapolis and I hadn't seen her in such a long time.  It was so good to catch up with her, yet, I knew her heart was breaking for her mom.  Erwin was still his ornery self and kept us all in stitches!  Every person that walked through Othelia's door got met with this: "Did you know she wrote a book?"  Erwin was my biggest fan and promoter of the book, to the point I turned red when he said it over and over!  Deep down, I was delighted that he was proud of me.  It felt good to have him so proud.

Othelia got released to a rehab in Dumas and later went on home.  Not long after she got home, Celesta sent me a text that said her mom had regressed and seemed ready to let go.  It was all happening so fast, I was in disbelief!  In the meantime, Erwin had a minor prostate surgery scheduled for the 21st.  Now this is a man who never drank a drop of alcohol nor touched tobacco in his entire life!  (oh how I wish I could say that as well.) 

After the surgery, Erwin's blood pressure dropped drastically and he suffered a massive heart attack.  The doctors and nurses worked desperately to save him, but the damage was too extensive.  In a second, Erwin was gone from this earth.  What?  What just happened here?  That was a Tuesday morning.  Meanwhile, Othelia is barely hanging on for her life and two days later, she passes and is now in the arms of Jesus and Erwin once again.  Bittersweet, huh?  62 years together on earth.  Eternity in Heaven.  A love story like no other.

But wait, there's more!  Celesta's husband, Scott, had never given his life to Jesus.  This worried Othelia as she talked about her concerns when I was at her house in December.  This was a burden on her heart and had become a burden on my heart as well.  Yet, God in all His splendor and glory made all things good for those who love the Lord!  The night before Erwin and Othelia's celebration of life service, Scott gave his life to the Lord and accepted Jesus as his Savior!!!

In God's world, ALL things work together for good!  ALL THINGS!  Sure, we are sad to lose Erwin and Othelia from this physical world...but it's just a small window of time compared to our eternal lives we'll spend with them and Jesus....but it is all worth it to have ONE life saved from hell and condemnation!  As believers, THAT is what it's all about!  Sharing the Good News of Jesus with those who are lost so they can spend eternity in Heaven!!!  Erwin and Othelia are dancing with the angels and celebrating the new life of their son-in-law Scott!  I bet they wouldn't have it any other way than how it all worked out this week.  I certainly wouldn't either.

"God our Savior. . .wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth."

I Timothy 2:3-4

Coming Full Circle

On October 11, 2012, I have the honor and privilege of speaking at the First Baptist Church in Sunray, Texas.  Now, to some big city folks, that might not seem like such a great honor, but for me, it is.  You see, that is the small town I grew up in.  The town where I thought everything in life happened and if I went out of town, I might miss something!  Yes, that is true!

I'm reading through my book again and am reminded that for many years, I held such bad memories in my heart of Sunray.  My parents divorced, my dad died, my family dismantled in a horrible way, my mom died....you get the picture.  These events scarred me for years and I carried wounds so deeply in my soul, I didn't even know they still existed until I began writing my book.

So after five long years of writing and healing, soon I will be standing in the very church I attended with my friends, the Cartrite's.  Oh, how they tried to help me, direct me, teach me as a young girl to come to Jesus.  I never got it at that young age, but I'll never forget their love for me. 

I am looking so forward to this time at home with my friends of long ago.  I'm thrilled to tell my testimony to those who loved me and wanted the best for me.  I took the long way around the mountain, but God has done an amazing work in my heart with His love, grace and mercy and I am here to tell the story!  There is victory to be celebrated!!  Thank You, Lord!

They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony; 

they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.

Revelation 12:11

A Change of Heart

"No, a true Jew is one whose heart is right with God.  And true circumcision is not merely obeying the letter of the law; rather, it is a change of heart produced by God's Spirit.  And a person with a changed heart seeks praise from God, not from people." ~ Romans 2:29 NLT

One of my favorite quote is:  "You cannot hide a changed heart."  I love that.  It's true, you know?  Have you ever run across someone you haven't seen in years and they are completely different than what you remember? (In a good way?)  What happened, you wonder?  Somewhere along their journey, they must have had a 'change of heart.'

God did a real number on my heart several years ago, once I allowed Him access.  For so many years, I kept God at arm's length because I honestly didn't want to go through the pain of a changed heart.  But then, the pain I was in became more than the pain of changing my heart.  I got on my knees and cried out to God, "Change Me!!!"  I didn't ask God to change anyone else but me. I no longer blamed others, but finally decided it was time I prayed that God change me, instead of everyone else.

You know what happened after that?  Nothing short of a total transformation in my life-seriously!  I began to focus on what was out of whack with me, instead of everyone else and that's when my life changed tremendously!  My only regret is that I didn't do that sooner.

So, is there something keeping you from a 'change of heart?'  Fear?  Stubbornness? Pride?  Whatever it is, dump it and ask God to sincerely change YOUR heart.  He will gladly come to your rescue and answer that prayer...in fact, I sometimes wonder if that is not God's favorite prayer from His children:

"God, will You change my heart to be more like Yours?"

Dog Birthdays in Heaven?

Jesus and Shorty

Today would be Shorty's 15th birthday and I'm wondering how dogs celebrate in Heaven. . .?  I can imagine Shorty running through the grass, playing with the other dogs, and Itty (my cat).  It's been almost 3 weeks since Shorty went to be with the Lord.  The first three days after Shorty's passing were absolutely grueling.  There were many times I didn't think the pain would let up and the heaviness was almost unbearable occasionally.

Then, on the fourth day, God whispered to my Spirit, "Dawn, I gave Shorty to you for a season in your life to fulfill a purpose.  Shorty was wonderful for you during that season and many times, was like an Angel that helped you through some dark days, all the while, bringing you joy every time you walked in your house and she ran to meet you.  Shorty fulfilled her purpose in your life and for that season and now it's time for her to come on home.  That is why I've now given you Sugar.  She will fulfill a different purpose in your life and in this new season."

Sugar and Me

It was those words from God that finally brought some much needed peace to my aching heart.  God knew I needed a "cross-over" dachshund if the time ever came to put Shorty to sleep.  Honestly, I couldn't imagine NOT having a dachshund in my life-ever!  God also knew that I didn't need a puppy to have to train, but I needed a loving dachshund who would sit on my lap for hours; who would be happy to visit my aunts without barking or nervousness; who could travel easily with me if I needed to sneak her into a hotel; a dog who fell in love with me as quickly as I fell in love with her....and many more attributes that go unsaid...but understood.  God knew what I needed even before I asked.

It's crazy to think that He just put Sugar in my path one day, but He did.  I know why and so does He.  My tears today are for joy to celebrate all the wonderful years I had with Shorty Danielle and the wonderful gift God gave me in Sugar Britches.  I am so grateful.  I look at Sugar and see how GOOD God is to me...His mercy triumphs everything.  For all you pet lovers who have lost a loved one, my heart goes out to you as well.  It's difficult to understand the remarkable bond between pet and human...but it is undeniably sometimes thicker than skin, huh?

"The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the one who seeks Him."

Lamentations 3:25

Life without Shorty

Today ended an almost 15 year relationship between Shorty Danielle, my beloved dachshund dog/child and me.  Our relationship was never "normal", but undeniably, she was a part of me and I of her.  I've never loved a dog like I loved her.  She was without doubt, an Angel sent by God to be with me for almost 15 years.  A constant companion through thick and thin.

Making the decision to put Shorty to sleep has been one of the most difficult decisions I've made in a LONG time. (Don't let the smile fool ya, there's a heart broken into a million pieces underneath it.) Her mental capacity had diminished so drastically in the past few months, I could no longer deny her age and the progression of her dementia.  Denial is such a protective sheath until one day, it's yanked away and you can no longer deny what is right in front of you.

Shorty and Me 8-9-12

When I look back over the past year, I can see when the decline started.  I think the move in April 2010 over to Greenbriar was more difficult for her older mind than I ever dreamed.  She was 13 when we moved and dogs over 7 are considered geriatric.  When their environments change dramatically, it can cause the dementia to escalate.  I see now when the decline started.  Then when we moved this April to the Condo, the dementia came on so quickly, I couldn't deny it.

In my heart, I began to "entertain" the idea that Shorty wasn't going to out live me.  Although, I'd secretly wished she would so I'd never have to go through a day like today.  But somehow, I've got to dig deep and lean in on Jesus right now.  I feel my faith, trust and belief vanished for a few days as the grief was so unbearable at times.  I'm not a good griever.  I don't allow myself much in that area and can mentally demand that I "get over it."  Not this time.  There's no "getting over it."  I'm going to have to walk through the grief, step by step, minute by minute, until finally there's more grace than grief and joy returns. 

Today, I saw the most beautiful acts of friendship and compassion between Gary, Jimmy, my father-in-law, Twilla Woolsey, my sweet friend and Tami Cox, another sweet friend, plus all the staff and Dr. Solomon at Swann's Animal Clinic.  Shorty had never been a patient there, but I knew I had to find a Veterinarian who was compassionate, understanding and would allow me to hold Shorty as she fell asleep in my arms.  It was so important to me to have a peaceful experience, that I wasn't able to make the decision until we found Swann.  I am so grateful to all those present today with Shorty and me as our life here on Earth ended together.

Shorty is now buried in my father and mother-in-law's backyard where I can visit her grave anytime.  I'm extremely grateful for that as well.  My stomach still gnaws at me and my heart still grieves this precious dog/child, but I'm trying to look on the bright side. . .I have a loving husband who understands my love of Shorty, I have wonderful friends and family who understand and I have another dachshund, Sugar, whom God put in my life 2 weeks ago....we ran right into each other as she strode down the sidewalk of a busy street with no tags on, no collar, nothing.  God assured me that He created her just for me, for such a time as this.  She has helped ease the pain of Shorty's passing.

It's minute by minute right now.  I look forward to day by day, year by year and then, as I enter the gates of Heaven, Shorty will meet me, running as fast as she can, tail wagging, tongue licking.  Thank You, Sweet Jesus for hope.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Romans 15:13

Just How Big A Boy Are Ya?

The other day, God in all His sweet graciousness, gave me a word picture of satan and what I'm up against when he drives himself into my life, into a relationship or any area God has given me...So go here with me in your imagination if you will. . .

I get an "invitation" to meet satan one night at a parking lot...he's ready to fight and all week long he's been driving by my house, revving up his engine really loud, squealing and burning out on his tires and just really making a menace of himself in my world...

From what I hear of his rumblings outside my house, it's a bit intimidating, to say the least!  I allow fear to well up inside me and I begin to question, "Do I really believe I can trample him down like the bible says I can?  Do I really believe I can overcome him?"  But I have to prove that I believe what I say I believe, so I take his invitation and meet him at the parking lot for the "fight!"

I pull up in my 4-door Camry with it's quiet engine, normal car-sized tires and wait. . .heart is beating faster and faster....palms are sweating..."oh my. . .can I do this?" I wonder.
Then, I hear this LOUD noise coming around the block and think, "What on Earth is that?"  And around the bend comes this HUGE black truck, tires so big, they look like they belong on a tractor!  The engine is so LOUD I put my hands over my ears to block out the obnoxious sound!  The windows are tinted black and I can't even make out the driver, but I know it's him.  He pulls right up to my front bumper, and has the audacity to bump it and start to push my car backwards.  I put my foot on the brake-I'm standing firm.  He finally stops, puts his big monster truck in park and opens his driver's side door. 

I get out of my car and come around to meet him, just  a few feet away from his door....then I see something silver sliding down from the cab...it's a LADDER!  Yes! I kid you not!  He slides a ladder to the pavement, makes sure it's secure and then steps down it, one little foot at a time...I see these pint-sized legs emerge down the steps and wonder, "who is this?"  With both feet firmly on the ground, he turns to me-hands on his hips, scowl on his face and says, "You wanna a piece of me," with a squeaky voice to fit his stature....all 3 feet of him! 

I could not believe my eyes!  I chuckled out loud and said, "This is it?  You're the guy in the big monster truck, driving by my house, trying to intimidate me?  You're it?" I can't help but laugh at the little man standing before me, shaking my head in disbelief!  I walk over to him, jump up, and trample him in one swift move..."I'm so done with you, satan," I casually say as I walk back to my car, get in, and drive away.  I'm still shaking my head today in disbelief that for YEARS I've allowed him to intimidate me, scare me, defeat me, deceive me and even try to destroy me.  I will never look at him the same way and I hope you won't either! :)

I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.

Luke 10:19 NIV

Run TO God - Not Away from Him

A sweet word from the Lord this morning in my quiet time. . .

I am not the God who cracks the whip, waiting to punish and ridicule you when you make a mistake; waiting to condemn your every wrong word or move. I AM a God of Love.  I AM LOVE - I exude love, emit love, bleed love, pour out love!  I love you!  I love My people so much!  Yet, they run from Me seeking places to hide from Me - when all I've ever wanted was for them to run to Me!

It's similar to when you (Dawn) hold your arms out to Shorty (my precious dog) and she looks at you and walks away.  How do you feel when she does that?  Sad, disappointed, rejected.

All you wanted was for her to come to you and let you hold her and love on her, be near her because you adore her, right? Right.

But she's stubborn and she walks off.  Maybe she fears you'll load her up in the car and haul her off to the Vet's office (she hates that.)  But in reality, that wasn't your plan at all.  You deeply desired to love on her, pet her and show her how much she means to you.

It's no different with My children.  I desperately want them to come to me.  My arms are wide open.  I want to love on them because I adore them.  They make Me smile.  Yet, so many of my children walk away, afraid I have punishment for them instead of love.  In that case, we both miss out on the blessing of My unfailing, unconditional love.

Because I AM Love and that's what I have for you, My children - all I want is for you to love Me, Your God, with all your heart, all your soul and all your mind. This is the first and great commandment. (Matt. 22:37-38)  Why?  To restrict you?  To bind you?  To control you?  No! Not at all!  But to lavish you with what you've been searching for all your life.  You need not search any longer.  I AM here.  I AM the Love you've been chasing after all along.  My arms are open.  My Love is free for you.  Come, receive the endless Love I have for you, My children.

Taste and see that I AM good!  Blessed is the one who takes refuge in Me. (Ps. 34:8)

My Goal is to NOT Sin. . .

I John 2:1-2

"My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father.  He is Jesus Christ, the One who is truly righteous.  He Himself is the sacrifice that atones for our sins-and not only our sins but the sins of all the world."

It sounds presumptuous to say, "...My goal is to NOT sin," doesn't it?  Even writing that seems somewhat pompous, but the truth is....as a Christian, my goal is to NOT sin, but to live like Christ.  Because of the powerful grace of God, I have the nature of Christ (His Spirit) living inside me since I was born again!

BUT. . .

"....if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father.  He is Jesus Christ, the One who is truly righteous."

Notice, the scripture says, ". . .but, if".....not "....but, when"....would it be safe to say that John is speaking to us as if we probably won't sin?  He certainly doesn't assume we are going to sin, or he might have used the word "when"...not "if." 

I sinned last weekend.  I sin most every day, but last weekend was a blatant sin.  Is there any difference from the blatant sins and the secret sins?  No. No difference at all except this, one is in front of people, one is in the dark where no one sees...No one except God the Father.

My old self and nature wanted to allow guilt, shame and condemnation to come flooding in and take up residence, but I had to fight hard to not allow that.  What was my tactic?  Admit my sin, (confession to God and my sweet husband), repent (feel enough remorse that I don't want to do that again), and seek God's forgiveness, (even though I've already been forgiven of all my sins, past, present and future.) 

So, if I'm already forgiven, then why the 3-step process mentioned above from
I John 1:9?  For me, it puts me in a position of humility...which thankfully is the opposite of pride, which by the way, can be a #1 culprit of sin.

My goal is to NOT sin.  I must be on guard at all times for the enemy who is lurking around, seeking whom he may devour.  It's easy to get complacent and comfortable, and that is when the enemy strikes, catches me off-guard and causes me to stumble.  God has given me ample revelation already about the enemy's tactics, I must use that knowledge and the Sword of the Word to combat his every scheme.  Today, I am most grateful that I have an Advocate who pleads my case before my Father in Heaven.  There is no sin so great that could ever change God's love for us....He is full of grace, mercy and peace for all of us.

Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.

 I Peter 5:8 NLT

Continuing on the Path of Simplicity

A few posts ago, I wrote about my journey to an Abundantly Simple Holy Life.  That was right about when we moved from our 3600 square foot house to our 1600 square foot rental.  Here it is, two months later, and I have thoroughly enjoyed the simpler life style.  I think about all of our other not-so-necessary belongings in that 10 x 30 storage building and shudder at the thought of unpacking it all when/if we find a home to buy again.

I can't begin to tell you how liberating it is to be renting right now!  We don't have to mow the grass, the homeowner's association contracts with someone to do that.  No taxes, no home insurance, no maintenance either!  We are grateful we have a garage to park our vehicles in and a small storage building for odds and ends we might need this summer.

We've begun the search for a new home, but honestly, I'm not feeling the deep desire to move just yet.  I love the central location we're in now and the thought of having to move far north or south just doesn't appeal to me at this current time.  I'm wondering if home ownership is overrated in America?

After reading the book Radical by David Platt, it's easy to wonder that as he concludes that the "American Dream" does not line up with the Gospel of Jesus.  It just doesn't.  I don't know what God has in store for Gary and me down the road as far as a home goes, but I can see, quite clearly, that home ownership is not as big a deal as I once thought it was.

I'm sure at some point the freedom of renting may burn out with us, but right now, it's a good thing.  Our load is light.  Stress level is low.  God is in control....as always.

Be blessed dear friend!

Keep it simple!

Setting the Record Straght

All my life, I have struggled with the concept of grace.  More so in the past than recently. I am a slow "get it" kind of person at times, but when I need to "get it"...I just keep after "it."  Right now, the "it" is GRACE. 

Several years ago, I got a revelation of grace from God and it set me free.  Long story short, God whispered to me, "Dawn, if you never lift another finger, in your lifetime; if you never do another "good deed", in your lifetime. . .it's okay-My grace is sufficient for you.  For the first time ever, I think I really "got" what God had been trying to give me all along with His wonderful gift of grace.  I felt the shackles of performance, pleasing, approval seeking, and doing- fall off of me in that instant.

Fast forward to today...even though I can recall that day as if it were yesterday, the enemy has not given up his efforts to steal, kill and destroy any revelation of grace I received in that moment.  I continue to study God's word, and other teachings on the subject and simultaneously ask God for a new, deeper revelation of grace.  He is always willing to answer a prayer like that, no doubt.

While reading Clark Whitten's book Pure Grace a few statements jumped off the page that I want to share with you....

"Those who receive the abundance of grace are the ones who reign in life.  Good receivers, not good performers, are the ones who reign!"

"Our willingness  and sense of liberty to receive all Jesus died to give is the key here!"

"We are warned not to sin against grace.  Listen, the only way to sin against grace is to refuse to receive the grace it cost Jesus His life to give.  Our only hope of "putting to death the deeds of the body [flesh]" (Rom. 8:13) is receiving the abundance of grace."

Grace is such a simply complex phenomenon to me.  There is nothing I can do to gain more grace...I only need to believe on Jesus and receive His gift of abundant grace.  I DO believe...it's the receiving part that gets in the way.  So, my goal is to become a better, more gracious (pun intended), Receiver.
When Jesus said, "It is finished," He meant EVERYTHING!  There is nothing left for me to do...He did it ALL.  I simply need to believe and receive.  Today, I choose to receive ALL that Jesus died for me to have on this Earth...ALL the grace, righteousness and abundance of life!  Amen to that!

Love is to God Like Water is to an Ocean

The other morning in my quiet time, I asked God to reveal Himself to me in a new way.  I read His Word and He's definitely revealed to me through that, but I wanted and needed a fresh revelation about Him that particular day.  Eager to answer a prayer such as that, He said this to me in my Spirit. . .

"Dawn, imagine the ocean . . .vast . . .never-ending to your eye . . .deep and wide like none other....

Water makes an ocean an ocean....water IS the ocean. . . if you jump into the ocean, you can't help but get covered up by the water...it surrounds you, 

engulfs you.....

Love is to Me, like water is to the ocean....I AM Love . . .My love engulfs you, surrounds you as you jump into Me . . .you can't help but be consumed by my love because I AM love."

For days, I have thought about that word picture and revelation from God over and over.  After spending four days at a Lake, surrounded by a body of water, I kept thinking about what God said. . .Love is to Him like water is to an ocean....

Be consumed and swallowed up by His never-ending love for you.  Jump in!  He's waiting for you.

"Because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions-it is by grace you have been saved."

Ephesians 2:4-5 NIV